花样年华 第五章（3）

    all morning long, his mom and dad ood so far.  lots of things.” said tommy.

    “, dear?” his mother asked. “did you learn ho more interesting than that. ht that arten to learn. but it had been so long since they had been in school they couldn’t remember. they asked him to call them ot home from school at the end of the day.

    the afternoon passed slo at four o’clock.

    it  songs?”

    tommy replied, “no, ebra.” his parents ebra  taught in kindergarten noht ot home from  day. on the h school. “look!” tommy said, “it’s my school!” “tommy!” said his dad, “that’s the high school! that’s only for big kids!” tommy replied, “you told me to follo kids to school. i thought the bigger the kids, the better the school.”

    谁死得更惨

    天堂门外站着三个男人。圣彼得说：“对不起，我们这里的人太多了，你们三个之中只有一个人能够进入天堂。所以，你们三个人之中，死得最惨的那个才能进来。”

    第一个人说：“哦，我刚结婚不久，我很嫉妒我的妻子和她的男性朋友，于是上班的时候，我不准他任何一个男性朋友。可我今天下班比较早，一到家我就发现咖啡桌上放着两个葡萄酒杯。我便问妻子为什么有两个杯子，她红着脸一言不发。我搜遍了整个屋子，想找出妻子的男性朋友，最后我看到有个人正抓着我家阳台的栏杆。一怒之下，我对着那双手一阵狂踢，直到那个流氓从15层楼上掉到一堆纸箱上。当我发现他还活着时，就搬起家里的冰箱扔了下去。就在这时，我突发心脏病而死。”

    圣彼得说：“噢，够惨的！下一个？”

    第二个人说：“我是一个窗户清洁工，一天，我正在公寓的17楼清洗窗户。不幸的是，安全带突然崩断，我掉了下来，幸亏抓住了15楼阳台的栏杆。我摒住呼吸，等着人来救我。忽然有个神经病人乱踢我的手，终于，我失手掉进下面的一堆纸箱。当我迷惑地睁开眼睛，却看到一个冰箱正朝着我的头砸来……”

    圣彼得说：“哎哟……够惨的。下一个？”

    第三个最后说：“唉，当时我正躲在冰箱里，突然……”</p>

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